One for the Books

I don't know if this was the most humbling moment of my life, but it has to rank pretty high up there. I saw a townhome in our complex up for sale and so checked out how much it was selling for. I already knew we had lost half of our equity the last time I checked, but wasn't prepared for what I saw. We not only lost all of our equity but our now in the hole several tens of thousands. We have been hoping to move in a year or so to get a single family house. This didn't look good; it looked horrible.

I felt the ground drop from under me, even though I was comfortably reclining in my lazyboy with Raffi on my lap. That feeling of weightless panic rose up my body and back down again like a tsunami. Some part of me, I'm not sure if it was my mind, heart or soul said to look to God or we'll all freak out. I prayed right away. It was short and I don't remember it exactly, but it was close to "HELP."

It really shows how much I live my life relying on myself and the constructs of control that I utilize to make myself feel secure.

So I breathed and gave my child a kiss. I now realize we are so blessed that my husband has a stable job, we can afford our house payment, with our tax refund we will pay off our credit card bills and we are learning to live within our means. When I think about these things, I feel like celebrating.

I sometimes wish that God would protect me from all bad things, but I know that is not possible. This world is so broken and I just can't wait for Heaven. I've been singing Amazing Grace to my son recently. I had to look up the lyrics online because I only knew the first verse. I love this part; it reminds me of what is really important and yet to come:

When we've been here ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we've first begun.

Yeh!

Raffi stood on his own tonight for about 25-30 seconds. He likes to climb up me and then sort of push off a bit and balance on his own. I'm so excited to see him progressing.

He has been fighting the naptimes lately and seems distracted easily during meals. He just wants to go run around. It will be fun when he is older and we can turn him loose on some park to burn off all that energy.

I joined two local moms groups, one which is year round and another that will start up in fall. I'm looking forward to getting connected with other moms in the area. It certainly has taken me a while to do so. I have enjoyed the mamma/baby yoga class but it is a little expensive and I don't think I will be able to keep doing it. The yoga teacher has started a mamma and movers yoga class, so I can always go to that class once Raffi really gets mobile.

I think Raffi is around 19 pounds. I weighed him on our home scale, which is very good, but oh well it is close. Please pray for Raffi to be meet the 20 pounds by his next doctor appointment on June 19th. That is a goal that the doc would like Raffi to be at by his 1 year old appointment.

Is your refrigerator running?

Thats good, because ours isn't. It is lightly jogging. The bottom drawers seem to be working but everything else is room temp or lightly cool. This refrig strike occurred on Saturday after we noticed the freezer wasn't frozen! Oh life. So the new ranch dressing I purchased is gone, alone with a bunch of other stuff. I was a little frustrated and angry at first. In a bit, I went to God and acknowledged that it is just food and it is just a Frig. And they are easily replaced. Hopefully, the repairman will fix it on Tuesday. And then a Grocery store run.

Prayer request: My excema has come back with a vengeance. My fingers are sore from the infected areas and I have small spots of "irritated" skin over my body. I feel discouraged after the last time it cleared up. I don't want to keep using the topical steroids, because it will become impervious and the side effects. So please pray that my body will heal and stay healed.